When You Can't Tell Real News From Parody...

It's not good. The latest problem blamed on global warming? Full cat shelters:

KANSAS CITY, Mo. (June 6, 2007) — These days cats outnumber dogs by 13.5 million and that number is growing. Today more than ever, animal shelters across the United States are reporting sky-rocketing influxes of cats and kittens being brought into their agencies. Many believe global warming is extending cat breeding seasons and causing the cat population to swell.

According to Kathy Warnick, president of Pets Across America — the largest umbrella organization for animal shelters serving more than 130 million people, global warming is thought to be a contributing factor to the dramatic increase of stray, owned, and feral cats.

“Cats are typically warm-weather, spring-time breeders,” reminds Warnick, who also serves as president of the Humane Society of Missouri. “However, states that typically experience primarily longer and colder winters are now seeing shorter, warmer winters, leading to year-round breeding.

Basically, there is no longer a reproduction lull with cat breeding cycles and unfortunately, it seems more people are bringing boxes of kittens into our agencies during winter now.”

Wait a minute. The temperature increase is something under a degree. And she wants us to believe that this is enough to explain a dramatic increase in cats?

I've noticed a dramatic increase in spoiled rich kids with no self-control (Paris Hilton, Lindsey Lohan, Brittany Spears) over the last few years. Maybe global warming is causing more bad parents to be naked, thus causing more reproduction.